damn I don't remember my friendster log in email. haha

Well, what can I say?

I'd still consider myself to be pretty lucky, yeah. I'm lucky enough to gripe about the pantry being filled with snacks I don't really eat rather than wondering if I will be able to eat at all.  Lucky enough to become flustered with the questions of identity and whatever other narcissistic problems rather than worrying about basic necessities.  Lucky.  Fortunate would be a better term to describe it.

About 2 hours ago I came here to reflect on things and after reading back over the last several years I've really been able to pick up on the changes in me.  Call it maturity, or maturing, but I'm glad that angst is gone.  I may still be unsettled but I'm not outwardly projecting it anymore.  I still don't have too much to show for myself, I'm realizing more and more that its not what you say but what you do that leaves your legacy.  If I could even call it that.  I suppose not many people venture on xanga anymore so I'm making this an outlet to figure things out. work things out.

I miss making the to do lists and more importantly the not to do lists. 

You know, I was convinced that this was a terrible year.  And there definitely is a lot of misfortune for me and my family.  But for a lot of people, it's been a great year.  Maybe my turn's next.  I'll be pretty determined to go out and get what I'm after.  haha.

"A day spent without laughter is a day that is wasted." i forgot who said it. apologies.